Thursday 6 January 2022

Pope Francis on fatherhood and motherhood in today's society (and, incidentally, on pets and children)

 The news media have picked up on an observation made by Pope Francis during his General Audience address yesterday, referring to the way in which some couples seem to preference taking pets into their household rather than having children. The BBC News website, for example, headlines their report Pope Francis says choosing pets over kids is selfish. As is usual in these situations, it is worth looking at the whole of what was said, both to gain a context for the headlined remark and to discover if there is a more significant underlying message that Pope Francis was trying to communicate.

The remarks were made during a reflection on the role of St Joseph as the (foster) father of Jesus at the General Audience of 5th January 2022. Pope Francis opened his reflection with a short account of the Scriptural/theological context of St Joseph's fatherhood, relating it particularly to a Jewish practice according to which a brother of the deceased would marry a childless widow, the children of this new union having the deceased brother as their legal father and the brother being a kind of foster father (cf Deuteronomy 25:5-6). 

Joseph already knows that, for Mary’s son, a name had already been prepared by God – Jesus’ name is given to him by his true father, God – “Jesus”, which means “the Lord saves”; as the Angel explains, “He will save his people from their sins” (Mt 1:21). This particular aspect of Joseph now enables us to reflect on fatherhood and motherhood. And this, I believe, is very important: thinking about fatherhood today. Because we live in an age of notorious orphanhood, don’t we? It is curious: our civilization is something of an orphan, and this orphanhood can be felt. May Saint Joseph, who took the place of the real father, God, help us to understand how to resolve this sense of orphanhood that is so harmful to us today.

In his address, Pope Francis does not go on to further develop this idea that our civilisation today has an experience of being orphaned; but there is a theme here that would be worth exploring more deeply. Instead be goes on to speak about the nature of fatherhood and motherhood.

It is not enough to bring a child into the world to also be the child’s father or mother. “Fathers are not born, but made[in the Italian this reads "si diventa", which has more of sense of "becomes"]. A man does not become a father simply by bringing a child into the world, but by taking up the responsibility to care for that child. Whenever a man accepts responsibility for the life of another, in some way he becomes a father to that person” (Apostolic Letter Patris corde). I think in a particular way of all those who are open to welcome life by way of adoption, which is such a generous and beautiful, good attitude. Joseph shows us that this type of bond is not secondary; it is not an afterthought, no. This kind of choice is among the highest forms of love, and of fatherhood and motherhood.

Again, there is a thought here that is worthy of a more extended consideration. Is Pope Francis suggesting that adoptive parenthood is not to be seen as second-best to natural parenthood, but rather that it has, with St Joseph as in some way its archetype, an original dignity alongside that of natural parenthood? 

Pope Francis' remark about couples perhaps preferring owning pets over having children is part of a wider observation about the unwillingness of many couples today to have children, or to limit their families to one child only.

... this denial of fatherhood or motherhood diminishes us, it takes away our humanity. And in this way civilization becomes aged and without humanity, because it loses the richness of fatherhood and motherhood. And our homeland suffers, as it does not have children, and, as it has been said somewhat humorously, “and now who will pay the taxes for my pension, if there are no children?”: with laughter, but it is the truth. Who will take care of me? I ask of Saint Joseph the grace to awaken consciences and to think about this: about having children. Fatherhood and motherhood are the fullness of the life of a person. Think about this. It is true, there is the spiritual fatherhood of those who consecrated themselves to God, and spiritual motherhood; but those who live in the world and get married, think about having children, of giving life, which they will take from you for the future [the Italian here reads ... "deve pensare ad avere figli, a dare la vita, perché saranno loro che gli chiuderanno gli occhi, che penseranno al suo futuro"..." must think to have children, to give life, because it will be they who will close your eyes, who will think about your future"]. And also, if you cannot have children, think about adoption. It is a risk, yes: having a child is always a risk, either naturally or by adoption. But it is riskier not to have them. It is riskier to deny fatherhood, or to deny motherhood, be it real or spiritual. But denial, a man or woman who do not develop the sense of fatherhood or motherhood, they are lacking something, something fundamental, something important.

Here it is the thought that "motherhood and fatherhood are the fullness of the life of a person" that perhaps needs further exploration, particularly in the consideration of those who remain single and do not marry; and the idea of a societal experience of fatherhood and motherhood that is denied when couples do not favour having children.

There is rather more to discuss from this General Audience address than just the remark about pets and children!

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