Sunday 11 July 2010

Living together

... is a phrase that can have a perfectly innocuous meaning. I live together with my neighbours, with my work colleagues, with my friends.

It can also mean moving in with an opposite sex partner without getting married. For different couples the circumstances may vary, but I have a sense that it will in most situations be the girl who makes herself most vulnerable in these arrangements. That vulnerability is both material and emotional. [One can perhaps extend the idea of "living together" to same sex partners moving in together, when I sense that the range and dynamics of vulnerability might be much deeper.]

The readiness with which young people do this makes Catholic Analysis' post on the subject of relevance. I think the suggestion in this post that there is something lost that cannot be regained is worthy of particular reflection.

1 comment:

Mary O'Regan said...

Very perceptive of you Joe to highlight that it is the girl who suffers most. Numerous research projects that I have read (and these research engines started out trying to prove that 'living together' or 'shackin' up' if you don't mind a bit of un-PC lingo) have all demonstrated that women suffer the most with the common trend being that women feel that they are 'in an interview constantly' for marriage, but often without ever getting the 'job'.